What More Can I Ask For?...

It's been a while... but I'm finally back here, where my old world is, and it's just how I left it...

Here's a recap of what I've encountered in the last 30 days...

London, England... what more can I say?

Amsterdam, Holland and its unusually slanted buildings and Inception-like bridges...

Germany and its greenery...

Venice, Italy and its indescribable beauty...

Of course, Italy's historical beauty with a blend of undeniable fashion...

The Leaning Tower of Pisa... it was the one sight that made me catch my breath...

Carcassone, Italy and its castles and fortified city...

Italian wood-fired pizza...

Barcelona, Spain and its crowded, topless beaches...

And, last but not least, the one thing I was waiting to go back to...

Looking back on the last 30 days, I have witnessed so much history, beauty, inspiration, love, and love again... what more can I ask for?...

A New Life

Kris Kan

So being that my wedding was almost two weeks ago, I am on my honeymoon now, which is why I haven't been posting. My life has been a series of events... exciting events, sad events, and unforgettable events for the past few weeks... and, now, I am traveling around Europe with my husband and a camera... what could be better?

Having moved through London, Holland, Germany, Switzerland, and now, here in Italy in just a few days, I am literally in heaven. Not to say that I don't miss my bed at home sometimes, but having gotten married, my bed at my previous home doesn't exist anymore. Now, it's time to make a new bed in a new home, which excites and scares me at the same time.

At this moment, I couldn't ask for more from my life. I have everything I need here with me and so much more that exists for me no matter what home I go back to. I have left the life I used to lead... my bed, my presence in the family home, my finished laundry, my cooked meals, my dusted room, and so much more I will soon begin to realize each day. I am moving towards a new life... a separate life, a private life, a life of companionship, a life of mutual respect, love, and new creations... I will be starting a new family... a new branch...

The unexplainable feelings I used to have are not unexplainable anymore... I can explain them by these few simple words: "A new life with new beginnings..."

I'm Lucky & Blessed

Kris Kan

The day has come and gone... We waited so long for July 2nd, 2011 and, now, the day has come and gone...
It was exactly how I had pictured it... the people, music, flowers, food, dresses, and... husband... it was perfect! The one thing I can recall from my wedding day was someone saying to me "Don't worry about anything... Just enjoy right now... this is your wedding day... just enjoy now!" While hearing it, I didn't think much of it but as people began to leave and the place emptied, I thought, "Wow... now, I know exactly what he meant..." I don't believe those words can be understood and taken in until your day has come and gone. If it hasn't and when the time comes, please don't worry about anything... just enjoy your day and your moment!
I'd like to take a moment and thank the few special friends who have helped me make this day special and perfect. Thank you to Kris Kan for capturing the moments, Christine, from Fancy That events, for making sure everything went as planned, Eric for putting in so much effort in trying to make my day special through his lens, and all the others who brought in their talents and skills. A special thank you to my family, of course, my bridesmaids, ushers, ring boy, the cutest little flower girls, the best man and his wifey, and... to my sister for being just that, my sister... I love you and thank you... You were my right hand in this and I can't imagine doing it alone. Lastly, a thank you to my husband, Armen, for making my dreams come true.
After the wedding, someone asked me, "Did everything turn out exactly how you planned it?" I thought about it for a second and said, "Nope... everything turned out exactly how I dreamt it..." Thank you to who ever is watching over me... I'm lucky and blessed!

If you'd like to see more pictures from the special day, check out Kris's blog at kriskanblog.com or Christine's blog at fancythatevents.blogspot.com

Today...

Yesterday, my sister asked, "I've been checking your blog... what happened? You haven't posted anything for two days." I looked back at her and said, "I don't know... I haven't had it..." So, yes, the reason why I haven't been posting everyday is because I haven't had it... My head has been consumed with so many things on my "To Do" list that I haven't had it. But, today... today is a special day and, today, I have it...

I had a dream... I had a dream that I woke up in the morning, put a white dress on, and went to the church to get married... Then, I woke up and realized that I did get up, put a white dress on, went to the church, and got married. Today, I got married! Today is also my husband's birthday... it was an unforgettable birthday!

Today, I went from being a Ms. to a Mrs... and I feel... protected. It's the only word I can use to describe having Armen in my life and, now, as my husband...

We have a song... I actually sang this song for Armen and recorded it on a cd for him about 8 years ago... And, today, as I listen to this song, my heart is filled with happiness and my eyes filled with tears...

Happy Birthday to my "husband"! You are all that is good in my life and I am so lucky to be your wife, today...

"Cuz I miss you body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away, and I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today... Cuz I love you, whether it's wrong or right... Though I can't be with you tonight, you know my heart is by your side." Daniel Beddingfield

My Weakness

There are so many thoughts that run through my head throughout the day that are worth blogging about... There are so many that when I find the time to get to it, it's all fuzzy in my head because they've overlapped so much...

My thoughts have been overlapping a lot lately... I've been here... I've been there... and, sometimes, I've been anywhere else but here... Right now, I'm here and... I'm with you...

No matter where you are, I'm with you... my thoughts are overlapping with you in them. You are what's with me at this moment and, right now, you're all there is...

Today, Armen and I went to speak with a priest about our marriage ceremony. We had been talking about it for a while but hadn't gotten to it yet. Well, today, we found one... and, after setting up the schedule and signing with him, he mentioned that we needed to take "marriage counseling" classes with him, before the ceremony. So, we both nodded our heads and agreed to it, considering that there was one week until the big day. We also agreed to taking our first class right then and there.

"Where were you born?" "How did you first meet?" were some of the questions we were asked. Then, he asked, "What do you like about Armen? Why do you want him to be your husband?" I stared back at him, feeling like I was in a movie, and said, "Well, he's honest, loyal, caring, smart... he's the best man I've ever met... and... he loves me so much..." "Do you love him?" he asked. "Yes, I do..." I answered. Then, he said, "Okay, what don't you like about him?" I sat there and thought about it for a second and said, "He's stubborn... and he needs to communicate more." The priest began to talk with Armen about communication and how important it was as I looked over at him and smiled, all the while laughing so hard inside. Then, he turned back to me and said, "Do you trust him?" and I replied, "Yes, I do... I trust him more than I trust myself."

He moved onto Armen asking him the same exact questions. His answers were predictable as I listened... Then, he answered, "Yes, I trust her more than I trust myself..." Right then, I knew I was right about him all along and that he was also trying to communicate with me.

For me, this husband and wife thing is about everything right, wrong, good, and bad with each other. The bad communication, stubbornness, love, and trust combined makes "us"... That's how we're built and as we move forward, we will try to make ourselves more stable and sturdy.

So, tonight, with all these overlapping thoughts, I wish I could share my thoughts about you to make my life more sturdy... but, all things built have a weakness, and you are mine...

Thank You!

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10 Days Away...

I sit here, in the kitchen, with jello... red, orange, and green jello... Actually, I threw the green part away because it tasted like medicine...

I know I said I'd be starting another year of this... I've been hesitant... but... now I'm here and I'm focused. I will be doing this everyday for as long as it takes for me to be content... content with my world, my thoughts, and my words...

There are exactly 10 days left until my wedding day... and I know that because I have an actual countdown on the mirror in my room. I cross it off every morning as I get ready for the day. In exactly 10 days, I will have a husband, I will be in my wedding dress, I will be throwing my bouquet, and I will be a bride. I've thought about this for a long time... I was never that little girl that dreamt about her wedding day but, I've been thinking about my wedding day for the past couple of years now and, now, it's 10 days away... The invitations have been sent out, the checks have been signed, the dress has been sewn, and I... I feel unexplainable...

The lady that was in the hospital died... My grandma hated black. She despised that color. Every time she'd see one of us wearing anything black, she'd say, "Don't you have any other color to wear? I'm going to take that off of you and tear it up!" We'd just react by not taking her seriously and shrugging our shoulders. Now, today, as I take my black clothes off, I realize why she hated it so much... Now, I despise the color black and I can't wait to wear my white dress in 10 days. I wish she could see me in it...

I'm glad they don't have black jello... I like colorful jello... except green. I realize that people are like jello... they come in different colors, shapes, and forms but... we can't take the green out of people. We have to take all they've got, the red, orange, and green, and, sometimes, even their black. That's what makes life interesting... all the different colors. Without it, jello would be clear and clear jello would have no flavor. So, with all of life's flavors these days, I can't wait for my feast that's 10 days away...

"For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For poise, walk with knowledge that you will never walk alone. People, even more than things have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed. Never throw out anyone." ♥ Audrey Hepburn