We Will Always Remember You

You attend funerals and show your respect to others as you watch family members struggle to let their loved ones go... but... when you're apart of the family, everything is different... Everything is you and a part of your heart... All your eyes see is the loss and sadness, no matter who shows up to comfort you.

When an older person dies, people (and I used to) feel that it should be easier to get over but, now, I understand that losing someone, at any age, is painful and unbearable. She was there one minute, asking the same questions over and over, and, then, she was gone... The first couple of days, I sat there trying to remember what her voice sounded like so I could keep it in my memory. I don't ever want to forget it...

Yesterday, my younger cousin, Eline, bought some balloons and had everybody write their letters to grandma as we let them go in the air and watched them go as far as our eyes could see... Some were in English, some Armenian, and some were drawings... but, I thought it was a nice way of sending her our love and saying, "Goodbye" for the last time. I can't imagine having gone through these past few days alone. I can't imagine not having someone there that understands the loss you feel. Thank you to all the ones who took the time to show up and send me their condolences somehow.

Grandma, thank you for being the special person that you were. We love you, miss you, and will always remember you...

Mom and grandma cooking on Mother's Day 2010